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Miku Live in Concert

Posted January 29, 2019
  • #vocaloid

I went on a field trip to some fancy theater with my friend Chula, who loves Vocaloid. “I wish I could do a concert with Hatsune Miku!” she said wistfully. It turns out Hatsune Miku was a real person who was also at the venue, who overheard us and was like “Whaaat? I’d love to do a concert with you Chula!” All three of us would perform together. Miku wanted us to rotate who sang each line of the songs, but no one knew the words except her (which is how you know it’s a dream of course ;d).

The main event at the theater was sort a hybrid between a stage play and a movie played on this old-fashioned TV set on stage. It was about a group of friends in the 90s searching for dangerous cryptids, but instead of being like, “wahaha, you found me!” when they were discovered, the entities would instead go out and “kill” a member of the audience. If you were chosen by the actors playing the cryptids, you had to play along and pretend to be dead. I was picked by some evil scuba diver who would put a respirator over your mouth that actually just suffocated you and break your fingers. He was supposed to just be acting but he was actually hurting my hand quite a bit!

Later, my brother and I were driving our dad’s old 1963 white cadillac in a parade. Then I became Luigi and had to beat some boss. I beat the boss, and as a reward, Jello said he’d drive me home to work on Pizza Game (that is not a reward). Instead, though, he drove me to an evil lab where my freshman year bio teacher was conducting rogue experiments. He was actually a living corpse, and had been spending a year post-mortum attempting to transfer his brain to a living being.

Next to the lab there was a huge spooky mansion some random folks and I were forced to go into. It was Spooky’s Jump Scare Mansion-esque, and every time you rounded a corner there was a chance of a random encounter. Some of these were innocuous, but sometimes it would be a monster that would kill you.

In order to escape, we had to find all the insanely well hidden moon stickers in the mansion. I found one by assembling a step stool from random pieces of rubble I found in the kitchen, which I then used to access a hidden attic, which was an entirely new area with its own enemies. I think the main enemy there was a woman, maybe a witch or something. I only even knew to look for the moon sticker there because I had apparently done this game before.

The entrance to the attic was near an open door leading to the garage. Random FNAF-type enemies would come through the door sometimes, so you had to keep an eye on it.

Suddenly… Santa.

“Oh fuck you guys, Santa is here,” I said.

We all ran the fuck away and tried to hide. I couldn’t hide in time, so my friend from fifth grade blew herself up to kill him and buy me time. I was like, “Emily noooo!! That doesn’t solve the problem at all!”

By that time I was back near the entrance area, so I was just sitting there watching for random encounters and probably waiting to die. I know at least one of the encounters was like this stuffed corpse family of farmer zombies on a couch. They weren’t moving, but honestly that’s not the kind of thing you go towards for a moon sticker, because they’re deffo going to lunge out and kill you. I tried to pretend I wasn’t scared of this place while simultaneously SMASHING the “wake up from dream” button.

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Last updated on July 5, 2019

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